[It's fine, Rin doesn't bite. And he's being thoughtful enough to give some good advice, maybe.]
We messed up once too. We missed an obvious clue, and someone got voted out for something they didn't do. It was horrible, she didn't deserve it at all.
But you know, we couldn't stop there. If we stopped and cried about how we'd been wrong, we never would've solved the next week's case. Or the week after. Sometimes you gotta accept that you were wrong and keep going to save everyone else.
[ honestly, he just hates hearing that there have been so many mistakes... ]
I get it, I just— I'm a prosecutor, you know? And I'm supposed to be the best one! Getting the right criminal and arguing for their guilt and making them face justice is my job!
[ though he feels like sort of a hypocrite talking like this when just over a month ago he'd cared a lot more about winning than he did about making sure he had the right culprit, which makes everything feel even worse. he's reminded of it every time he walks by that dumb edgeworth statue in the courtyard, too. ]
A-and he's kind of my friend too, so... I should have found more evidence against someone else, or pushed harder, or... something...
[ he sniffs and pulls a handkerchief out of his jacket pocket to wipe his nose. ]
I'm sure Pops would've been able to bring all the evidence he needed against the real killer if he was the one doing these stupid trials. They should have kidnapped me instead...
[Oh no. Sebastian, you poor bean. Rin's heart aches for him when he hears that. Not only is the situation relatable, but so is the sentiment of 'I'm not good enough'.]
Well yeah, he probably would've. Just like my dad would've figured it out right away if he was the one here instead of me. But they're adults. Of course they're gonna be better at stuff than us, they're older! That doesn't mean you're wrong for being not as good at stuff, or that you should've been kidnapped instead. It just means you're gonna find your own way to solve cases here.
No matter what happens, you are you and that's all you gotta be. You can't compare yourself to other people, because that's not fair to you. All you gotta do is be better than you were yesterday, yeah?
[Rin is surprising himself with how much he sounds like his father here. It only took a year of trauma for those lessons on self-growth and empathy to finally stick.]
[ Unfortunately their fathers are very different people.
Sebastian is nodding along slowly with the first part of that, because yeah... he guesses that's kind of true. Pops has a whole fifty years more experience with everything than he does. He thinks that still sort of means everyone really would be better off with him here instead... but he also can't change that part, so all he has to work with is his own best.
At the second part, though, the feelings of inadequacy are rattling around in his head so loudly that the sentiment gets warped into "you're you and that's all you're gonna be" and he looks a little bit nauseated. ]
W-what if I'm not getting better, though? Not even just here, but at home. At my school, I really was the best, but ever since then... people are just proving me wrong all the time and making me look like an idiot and treating me like a joke! It's like I'm just... going backwards and getting worse and disappointing everybody...
You're looking at it all wrong! Getting stuff wrong doesn't mean you're going backwards, it's how you learn!
It's kinda like cooking: sure, you can read a recipe and kinda get it ok the first time? But the way to really learn how to make something new is to make it over and over again until you got it down perfectly. If you try to make bread, you won't know you're kneading it too hard until you've tried it once, yeah? No amount of describing it will make you perfect at making bread until you've tried it yourself and you can feel just how hard you should be kneading it.
Everything else in life's like that too: making mistakes is just how you learn 'oh, that way didn't work, let's try another way.'
[He's trying to be encouraging, he really is. But he's talking from a space where he's always been a fuck-up in some way, and it might hit differently for someone who's been a prodigy up until now.]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2022-06-26 03:38 am (UTC)Woah, you okay?
no subject
Date: 2022-06-26 03:42 am (UTC)Of course not!! We're killing somebody who didn't do anything wrong because I wasn't— we weren't good enough!
no subject
Date: 2022-06-26 03:56 am (UTC)You really didn't get any of the votes wrong where you were?
no subject
Date: 2022-06-26 03:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-26 04:13 am (UTC)Oi, come over and sit down already.
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Date: 2022-06-26 05:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-26 05:20 am (UTC)We messed up once too. We missed an obvious clue, and someone got voted out for something they didn't do. It was horrible, she didn't deserve it at all.
But you know, we couldn't stop there. If we stopped and cried about how we'd been wrong, we never would've solved the next week's case. Or the week after. Sometimes you gotta accept that you were wrong and keep going to save everyone else.
no subject
Date: 2022-06-26 04:10 pm (UTC)[ honestly, he just hates hearing that there have been so many mistakes... ]
I get it, I just— I'm a prosecutor, you know? And I'm supposed to be the best one! Getting the right criminal and arguing for their guilt and making them face justice is my job!
[ though he feels like sort of a hypocrite talking like this when just over a month ago he'd cared a lot more about winning than he did about making sure he had the right culprit, which makes everything feel even worse. he's reminded of it every time he walks by that dumb edgeworth statue in the courtyard, too. ]
A-and he's kind of my friend too, so... I should have found more evidence against someone else, or pushed harder, or... something...
[ he sniffs and pulls a handkerchief out of his jacket pocket to wipe his nose. ]
I'm sure Pops would've been able to bring all the evidence he needed against the real killer if he was the one doing these stupid trials. They should have kidnapped me instead...
no subject
Date: 2022-06-27 01:49 am (UTC)Well yeah, he probably would've. Just like my dad would've figured it out right away if he was the one here instead of me. But they're adults. Of course they're gonna be better at stuff than us, they're older! That doesn't mean you're wrong for being not as good at stuff, or that you should've been kidnapped instead. It just means you're gonna find your own way to solve cases here.
No matter what happens, you are you and that's all you gotta be. You can't compare yourself to other people, because that's not fair to you. All you gotta do is be better than you were yesterday, yeah?
[Rin is surprising himself with how much he sounds like his father here. It only took a year of trauma for those lessons on self-growth and empathy to finally stick.]
no subject
Date: 2022-06-27 12:18 pm (UTC)Sebastian is nodding along slowly with the first part of that, because yeah... he guesses that's kind of true. Pops has a whole fifty years more experience with everything than he does. He thinks that still sort of means everyone really would be better off with him here instead... but he also can't change that part, so all he has to work with is his own best.
At the second part, though, the feelings of inadequacy are rattling around in his head so loudly that the sentiment gets warped into "you're you and that's all you're gonna be" and he looks a little bit nauseated. ]
W-what if I'm not getting better, though? Not even just here, but at home. At my school, I really was the best, but ever since then... people are just proving me wrong all the time and making me look like an idiot and treating me like a joke! It's like I'm just... going backwards and getting worse and disappointing everybody...
no subject
Date: 2022-06-27 05:26 pm (UTC)It's kinda like cooking: sure, you can read a recipe and kinda get it ok the first time? But the way to really learn how to make something new is to make it over and over again until you got it down perfectly. If you try to make bread, you won't know you're kneading it too hard until you've tried it once, yeah? No amount of describing it will make you perfect at making bread until you've tried it yourself and you can feel just how hard you should be kneading it.
Everything else in life's like that too: making mistakes is just how you learn 'oh, that way didn't work, let's try another way.'
[He's trying to be encouraging, he really is. But he's talking from a space where he's always been a fuck-up in some way, and it might hit differently for someone who's been a prodigy up until now.]